Never shake a baby, however exhausted or angry you feel
Babies have relatively large heads and weak necks. Violent shaking can cause brain and retinal bleeding, death or lifelong disability. Gentle soothing motion is different from uncontrolled forceful shaking. If you are losing control, put the baby safely in the cot and step away for a few minutes; brief crying is safer than being shaken.
What it takes
Free. Stopping yourself when overwhelmed is the challenge.
What you may gain
Babies have relatively large heads and weak neck muscles. Violent shaking can cause intracranial and retinal hemorrhage—bleeding in the brain and eyes—with fatal or permanent consequences. Gentle rocking to soothe a baby is different from uncontrolled forceful shaking. Shaking/impact-related abusive head trauma is the leading cause of head-injury death under age 2. In the US during 1999–2014, it caused nearly 2,250 deaths among children under 5.
Context & considerations
At the point of losing control, place the baby safely in the cot and step away briefly. This matters especially for solo caregivers with prolonged sleep deprivation. See Chapter 3 for managing your own emotional load.
Research & references
Spies EL, Klevens J (2016). Fatal Abusive Head Trauma Among Children Aged <5 Years — United States, 1999–2014. MMWR 65(20):505-509. https://doi.org/10.15585/mmwr.mm6520a1; Choudhary AK et al. (2018). Consensus statement on abusive head trauma in infants and young children. Pediatric Radiology 48(8):1048-1065. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00247-018-4149-1